Nasty Blogger. Umm…

I’m skipping through the blogosphere, passing sunsets, kittens, and homeschoolers’ tales when I slam into a blogger who has a thing or two to tell ignorant new bloggers. I’m all ears, because, yes, I am an ignorant new blogger. I see myself all over his rants about what I’m doing wrong.

In fact, Nasty Blogger seems to be referring to such people making these errors as  “blogwhores.” (Hmmm.  Who knew there were angry people in the world? And, even in my friendly WordPress blogosphere?) Admittedly, it brought my lah-di-dah prance to a halt.

But, I am not offended. (Who would be offended by someone calling them a whore, right?) I know this is just one blogger’s opinion. One blogger who probably needs a hug. Or Jesus. Thanks fellow blogger. So helpful.

After absorbing this new information, I proceed to do what any professional writer does. I fact check. Using Urban Dictionary.

To my sunset, kitten posting, homeschooler bloggers: Do. Not. Go. There. You will not be pleased. I venture into the murky water of Urban Dictionary, taking one for the team. (You are welcome. I basically sold my soul for you.

This deserves at least a “like” back, wouldn’t you say? Or, if you aren’t currently following me…well, you know what you need to do.)

Not tracking with the whole “whore” thing yet? Let’s see the “official” definition:

Blogwhore  A person (usually young) who participates in all or most of the following:

1. Spending large amounts of time posting entries on his/her blog (usually a blogspot or wordpress blog) about things no one other than them cares about
2. Tries any way possible to get others to read his/her blog
3. Posts comments on every blog he/she comes across in hopes that other bloggers will find and comment on his/her blog.
4. Uses their blog to advance other areas of his/her life, such as relationships, positions in work, social status, or anything else.

Blogwhores can come in different categories…(My note: Stopping here because I think you get the picture.) By NOTABLOGWHORE, August 11, 2009

Guess Nasty Blogger called it! I’m kind of a blogwhore! What will I tell my grandchildren if they find out? What will I tell my kids? I can hear my adult son now.

*Chris: Mom, I can’t believe you’re a blogwhore!

Me: When did you start using such ugly language? We don’t talk like that in this house.

Chris: From YOU mom! I learned it from YOU! (And somehow I see him lighting up a joint here as he slips into debauchery.)

But, then it dawns on me. By definition,  my one and only son, iamchristodd.com/humor-essays is a blogwhore, too!

Where did we go wrong? My husband’s an elder in the church, for God’s sake. What if this leaks?

Not ready to leap to conclusions, I take a step back into my sane world (it’s there waiting patiently for me to return as it has learned it needs to do.) I reassure myself. I have only been blogging a few weeks. Maybe I’m more of a blogflirt at this point. I mean, I can’t deny seeking some harmless writing attention. On the other hand, I refrained from telling my favorite blogger that I am “so blog rolling him” yesterday. That’s in my favor, right?

Back to the mire, I see that there is no Urban Dictionary definition for “blogflirt” and I think that’s a good thing. Because, it appears that just a little bit of canoodling through “likes” and “witty comments” in the hope that you might gain a little “sumpin sumpin” is socially acceptable. Even for an elder’s wife. It simply means that you’re a blogger.

Happy blogging, everyone. Keep it friendly!

 

*For the record, Chris doesn’t talk like this and in case you’re not going to buy the book,  the answer is “Nice. So nice!” But, buy the book. Just do it.